Rudy emerged from the subway train station and immediately his eyes wandered, trying to locate one particular woman. It was almost seven and the dusk had almost completely settled. The place by the river was, as always at this after-office hour, crowded with people still in their working attires. A favorite place for rendezvous this place was, with the stretch of pubs and restaurants and located at the heart of the city.

Being average looking at best, Rudy had been thrilled when this lady had agreed to meet him in person. He replayed last night's conversation in the chat room.

lilcharm: this guy really pissed me off. he kept calling even after i changed my no, musta gotten from my friend.

devilshorn02: but no more right?

lilcharm: rite! thankfully so! but then i met two more guys and theyre no better! y do i keep running into guys like dis?

devilshorn02: why? because you are attractive it must be!

lilcharm: yayaya heard that too many times now it means nuttin.

Full of hope, Rudy looked at a woman dressed in jeans and a red tank-top. He was about to approach her when another guy did and took her hand. They kissed. Disappointed but fairly relieved not to have embarrassed himself in public, Rudy turned to another direction.

devilshorn02: what's your real name? i'm rudy.

lilcharm: hi rudy. im anna. u know i dont usually tell people on net dat. so keep it between us k?

devilshorn02: ok. so why did you tell me?

lilcharm: i dunno. coz ur diff maybe. wats u do?

devilshorn02: i'm doing my master degree. at nus.

lilcharm: wow! smart boy ah? its not cheap so u must b rich 2.

devilshorn02: well the fee is nothing compared to my undergraduate in california.

lilcharm: cali? man how exciting! hey y dont we meet.

devilshorn02: you mean really meet? as in face to face?

lilcharm: ya! y u scared? i dont bite. not on 1st date anyway haha!

devilshorn02: so it's a date? i mean, you consider it a date?

lilcharm: of coz! so u wanna meet or not?

devilshorn02: hell yeah! and if you're nice to me i'll buy you dinner.

lilcharm: haha! boy u will buy me dinner even if im not nice. but dont worry ill b nice.

Two more wrong girls in jeans and red tank-tops, Rudy was starting to fear the worst. Why was I so stupid and trusting? What if she only played me for a fool? What if... Rudy stopped in his track. What if she was a guy?

devilshorn02: how would i know you? will you be wearing something special?

lilcharm: sumthing special eh? wat u have in mind notty boy?

devilshorn02: no no no, don't get me wrong!

lilcharm: haha jus kidding boy! dont get urself stressed before meeting me. ok ok ill wear blue jeans and sleeveless. red. got dat boy?

devilshorn02: got it. you wanna know what i wear?

lilcharm: nvm u jus find me and i will know u anyway rite?

devilshorn02: great! so i'll see you then.

lilcharm: cu. oh i will wear pineapple earrings.

Pineapple earrings, how could I forget! Rudy saw her now. A girl in blue jeans and a red sleeveless shirt -- with a clearly visible gold pineapple-shaped earring dangling from each ear. Sitting alone on one of the many marble benches around, she was as attractive as what Rudy had hoped for. Rudy felt his heart leaping. He could not be mistaken this time, even with her showing no signs of expecting anyone.

After clearing his throat several times and replaying in mind his rehearsed opening lines, Rudy uttered a weak, "Hi."

She looked at him. "Yes?" A questioning look on her face.

"Hi," Rudy repeated. "I'm Rudy." He awkwardly offered his right hand.

The lady hesitated for a moment. Finally she shook the hand, but not before giving Rudy a head-to-toe inspection. "I'm Anna."

Rudy betrayed a sigh of relief. Well, at least he got the right person.

But, right about then Anna said, "Can I help you?"

Taken aback slightly, Rudy replied, "I am Rudy? Remember? From the chat room?"

"From chat room?" Anna looked somewhat amused and displeased at the same time. "Gosh, not again!"

"Beg you pardon?"

"Oh, no, no. It's not your fault. I mean... Listen, why don't you sit down."

"Sure." So he did, next to the girl. Because it was about the only thing to do at the moment.

"Rudy, right? Listen, I'm not the person chatting with you in whatever chat room that was."

"You're not? But..."

"I know. The person must've described me very well, huh?"

"Oh yeah!" Rudy nodded emphatically. "Very well."

"Tell me, what exactly did he -- well, he or she, although I suspect he -- what did this person say to you?"

"Well. For a start, red sleeveless and jeans."

Anna nodded. "Go on."

"And the place. Oh, and for sure, the earrings. Very distinctive. Nice pair, by the way." Hey, not bad! So smooth of me to include that last line. Rudy almost smiled.

"Why, thank you." Anna did smile, rather shyly. "See, that's the thing. This is not the first time it happens to me."

"I noticed you said again. What happened?"

Anna raised her beautiful shoulders in indifference and Rudy could not help but stare. She did not seem to notice, fortunately. "It happened twice before. Not here, different places. But more or less the same proceedings."

She shrugged again. This time Rudy managed not to move his eyes. "Guys came to me, thinking I was the girl they had chatted with on the Net. Each of them knew what I was wearing, just like you did. And I can tell you, I wore different outfits on both occasions!"

"You didn't!" Rudy said. Unable to think of anything else to say.

"I sure did. I immediately suspected people at work. I mean, they're the ones who know what I'm wearing on a certain day, right?"

"Actually, they're not." This was something Rudy was good at, having grown up reading any detective novels he could lay his hands on. "They will know what you're wearing today, but they won't know what you'll be wearing tomorrow. Remember, the date --" he smiled faintly at the word, "was made before the day itself."

"Good observation," Anna smiled, "except that my working place is not your normal office. It's a clothing outlet -- sorry, I can't tell you details."

"I understand." Rudy nodded.

"Right. Yeah, we deal with customers and it's within the shop policy to control what we wear. I mean, not that the manager tells us what to wear, but we keep a list of what kind of outfit each of us will wear the next few days." In the park lights she noticed the look on Rudy's face and hurriedly added, "Look, I know it's kind of unusual to you, or any other people for that matter, but believe me, in this line of business, it's not that much so." Those silky smooth shoulders went up again. "Stupid, yes. But that's the company policy."

"And that includes accessories such as earrings?"

"Oh, these earrings?" She touched one of them lightly. "These are my favorite. I always put them on at least once a week. Everyone at work knows it."

"But even then, how would this person know you'll be wearing them today? You could've put something else this morning." Rudy was not convinced.

Anna smiled again. There was something about the smile that most men would find hard to resist. A very likable person this girl was. "That's not really a big deal, is it? So what if I, say, decided not to wear any earrings? So you wouldn't have recognized me and we wouldn't have met. Big deal, right? That childish person just waits for another victim."

"Victim," Rudy repeated sourly.

"Sorry," Anna made a face. "You and I are both victims here. But, what I said does make sense, doesn't it? This jerk loses nothing even if you and I -- or some other guy and I -- didn't meet. In fact, other than the other two encounters, there might've been more in store for me, they just didn't materialize."

It did make sense. Rudy looked at this girl's youthful face. He thought she was telling the truth. Although, there was one more...

"What about the place? Did the other two also take place here? I mean..."

"I know what you mean, Rudy." She looked at him. "I understand that it must be hard for you to accept you've become a prankster's object. But please, try to see it from my perspective. This is not the first time for me. And from the look of it, not the last time, either." She sighed. "If you must know, I come here often. I like sitting here, staring at the river. Sometimes I read. Look." She held up a paperback.

"I see."

An awkward silence followed. Finally, Rudy pulled out all his courage and said, "Uh, now that we've met anyway..." He looked at Anna, who waited. "...I know this is not really appropriate. But would you like to have some coffee, maybe?"

Anna didn't even hesitate. "I am so sorry, but no, thanks, Rudy. Nice of you to offer, but we're still strangers, even after we were made looking like fools together. Sorry."

Rudy now wished he had been somewhere else. He stood up. "In that case, I am very, very sorry to have bothered you."

"Like I said, it's not your fault."

"Good night, Anna."

"Good night. I think I'll be going as well."

***

When Anna got home, she immediately reached for the phone. "Jess? It happened again!"

"No kidding. The third time, would you believe it?"

"At least it was a nice guy this time. But still awful."

"Beats me. Maybe I should stop going there. You think so?"

"Come on, that won't be necessary. So far no harm's done."

"All right, if it happens again, it will be the last time. I promise."

"Yeah, I know. Kay, I'll see you 'morrow."

She put the phone down, poured herself a glass of cold water, and took the glass to her study. Looking at her reflection on the mirror behind the desk, she sighed and started taking off the pineapple earrings.

"Maybe it's time to do away with these," she spoke to herself, carefully putting the earrings in the accessory box. "They really look nice, but also bring too much trouble."

She thought of Rudy. Smart guy, no doubt. The way he probed about that company policy on their staff's clothing. And the earrings. Too bad he was not her type. In fact, he had a lot of ground to make up to meet her standards. Anna sighed again and made up her mind. The earrings had to go.

While waiting for her laptop to boot up, she thought what a crazy month it had been for her. Starting with Jessica's half-joking suggestion that she pick up guys at a certain chat room. "It's simple, girl. You flirt with those you think up to your expectation. Then check 'em out. You know, get them to meet you. Hey, I know it's not easy with your standards, but you can always duck and say it's a mix-up or something. You know."

It was indeed hard. She always knew she was not one easily satisfied. Money alone was not enough, she wanted her man to look well above average. Someone who could invoke envy from her girl friends. Someone who had to be smart also, so that she could bring to parties and introduce to important people. Definitely not an easy task. The three unsatisfying meet-ups confirmed that. Something always seemed lacking.

On the chat room's login page, she chose to register a new account. "Let's see... Ah yes." Pineapple_girl was taken, of course. And so were pineapple_gurl and sweet_pineapple and fresh_pineapple. So she settled on fineapple_girl.

"Here we go." She clasped her hands and crackled the joints. "Let's hope four is a lucky number, regardless of what the Chinese say."

***

fineapple_girl: this guy really pissed me off. i changed number but he kept calling, damn! musta gotten from my friend.

caribbean_jockey: i understand. guys like that dont deserve sweet gurl like u.

(So I watched Closer. Sue me.)

Current music: The Turtles - Happy Together
Current mood: happy